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I hate reviews with the passion of a thousand fiery suns. BRIGHT IT BURNS, I MAY COMBUST! Well, if I did, at least it would mean I wouldn't have to do this stinking review.

"Don't stress over it," they say. "It's no big deal," they say. "It's casual, informal, really just a chance to touch base and make sure you and your manager are on the same page. No sweat, it's all good." LIES, ALL LIES!

MangerGuy tells me to write something without spending too much time on it. I send it in, then he asks me for my final copy. Uhm. That was my final copy. Then he asks me to change my ratings and use the new company approved ratings for yearly review. Erm. I thought this was all casual, not-on-your-permanent-record level setting that I was not supposed to stress about. I tried to discuss it with him at my 1-to-1 but he said I had to write it up first and then he would tell me what he thought. I totally feel like I'm being set up for a fall. I suppose it's just my paranoia, but I don't trust him.


I asked a co-worker to look it over and she basically said that I'm not bragging enough. I need to sell myself more, always put a spin on any shortcomings, paint everything in a positive light. Soooo.... basically, learn to speak the Corporatesque Bullshitese language that I deeply despise.


I think someone should just write my review for me. I can write someone else's review. I can see what my co-workers do (or don't do) and I think that would be a far better way to do it. If I were Queen of the Universe, things would be different. Sadly, I am not. There was a serious mistake made when the Ubiquitous THEY decided not to appoint me Queen of the Universe, I'm telling you.

Now for important things, like John, Rodney and fanfic.

I had this mad crazy idea. I wish I could write as easily as I had mad crazy ideas. There would be a lot more fic, let me tell you. Ideas, easy. Writing them down, not so much. Anyway, let my 'splain a little.

I've been watching NCIS the last few months, in fits and starts. There's one channel that seemed to be playing 2 eps a night in chronological order, except I realized several weeks in that they were hopscotching through them, maybe playing half the season and missing lots - I had these gaps when I watched the opening "previously on NCIS" teasers. I figure though I'm mostly caught up to somewhere in the 8th or 9th season.

So, I've been mainlining NCIS fic, and man, it's really interesting when you're not invested in the show/fandom/characters how easy it is to read any ship, any pairing, gen - it's all good. But after a while, I started to get a taste for a pairing several pairings. On AO3, it looks like Tibbs is the McShep of NCIS, but there's a fair chunk of McNozzo as well. On FF.NET (which I dislike reading because of the layout and general non-user-friendly nature of the site) there's a lot more het, and that's where I found an multi-story Tiva epic that was really quite fantastic. I am really quite delighted to read all three pairings or none at all.

I am a little puzzled, though, at finding a goodly chunk of Ziva bashing, much akin to the Elizabeth bashing I sometimes found in SGA fic. There always seems to be more of it in slash fics, and I find it curious. Why do some people hate these characters so much? I mean, ok, I was not really enamoured of Elizabeth, but I thought she was a perfectly fine character. And when Keller came along, I just thought "Ugh! SO YOUNG AND SWEET NO! NOT a good match for Rodney!" but I didn't *hate* her or want to cast her as the bad guy - I just wanted to see her with someone who was a better match. I think she would have been smokin' with Ronon. Actually, even as a McShepper through and through, I think a romance between Sheppard and Keller would have been more believable. I think they'd be more compatible to be honest. but Ziva. Whoa. Dude, people who don't like her seem to really *hate* her, and cast all sorts of aspersions on her character. And, ok, I know she was Mossad and her daddy had her all twisted up to do his will and all, but I think she's more than proved herself. I just don't grok the haters.

Anyway. Back to what I was saying. I had an idea whilst I was in the shower. I seem to get many good ideas there, it's weird. I think I need a voice activated recorded in the bathroom so I can capture these ideas and not lose them forever before I even finish drying my hair.

So, DiNozzo and Sheppard both had a moneyed upbringing in affluent families. Their fathers were in business, moved in powerful circles, and as both families were on the east coast, it stands to reason (in my mind) that they could very likely have had some of the same friends. Possibly belonged to some of the same clubs - country clubs, golf clubs, yachting clubs, whatever the heck it is uber rich people who are concerned about appearances do. They could have been on vacation in the hamptons at the same time, or at Aspen, or hell, on the French Riviera. My point is, it seems quite likely to me that Sheppard and DiNozzo may have crossed paths as teens. They are both very attractive men, athletic, charming and competitive; they would have either despised either other or bonded like long lost brothers.


I'm thinking when those two met, it was like gas on a house fire. It was the summer of a lot of firsts - first hotwiring of a car, first time drunk, first time kissing a boy - I'm pretty sure they had a hella good summer till it all exploded in a giant clusterfuck. Wherever it was, the locals still haven't stopped talking about the shenanigans and scandal to this day, and the Sheppard and DiNozzo families have never gone back.

I'm also thinking that Sheppard Sr and DiNozzo Sr. probably said some cruel, truly despicable things to each of them, and then tried to poison them against one another. And being young men that still desperately wanted a father's love and respect even when trying to be tough and insolent, they bought into the lies and believed.

And that is the state of their relationship when 30 years later, security escorts Colonel John Sheppard into the Bullpen to meet the Major Crimes Response Team.


Gibbs looked up as security walked into the bullpen with a visitor. He studied the the man carefully, noting the messy shock of dark hair, somewhat incongruent with the fresh pressed dress uniform the man was wearing. He had a pleasant, cheerful looking smile, but it didn't reach his eyes and Gibbs could see the tension he carried in his frame. He leaned back in his chair as they approached, casually draping an arm over the back of it.

"Colonel Sheppard, Agent Gibbs," the security officer said by way of introduction as they approached his desk. Gibbs nodded in acknowledgement and the security officer walked away, leaving Sheppard standing there with a slightly bemused look.

"Now, why do I suddenly feel like I've been taken to the principal's office?" he asked, the corner of his mouth curving up in a slight smile.

Gibbs huffed in amusement and finally deigned to stand. "That would be Vance," he said, reaching out to shake the man's hand. "I'm just the playground monitor."

Sheppard let out a laugh as he gripped Gibb's hand firmly. "Let me guess. You let 'em run and only rein them in if they get out of control?"

"The occasional slap upside the head does wonders," he confided as he withdrew his hand and stepped out from behind his desk.

"I've always thought so," Sheppard agreed. He opened his mouth to say something else, but stopped, his expression going stiff and cold, eyes narrowing, hands clenching reflexively into fists.

Gibbs turned his head to follow Sheppard's gaze, which was fixed on DiNozzo and Ziva as they re-entered the bullpen after grabbing coffees. They were fully engaged in one of their many inane arguments, and had not yet noticed their visitor.

"That makes no sense at all, Tony!" Ziva protested, scowling at his smirk.

"Maybe not to you, Zee-VAH." Tony spoke in the superior, mocking tone he always adopted when trying to goad her on. "But it does to any red-blooded American."

"You two need to stop talking about football," Gibbs admonished, keeping an eye on Sheppard to gage his reaction even while checking to see how his people reacted. "Colonel Sheppard, this is Special Agent-"

"Anthony DiNozzo."

Gibbs watched as Tony paled then flushed, his fingers tightening around his coffee cup. After a moment, he pulled himself up to his full height, squaring off his stance as if preparing for an attack. "Johnny Sheppard," he replied in kind, the chill between the two of them cold enough to drop the temperature in the bullpen by a couple degrees.

Gibbs crossed his arms and stepped between the two men, giving each one of them a glare in turn. "Is there something I need to know about?"

Sheppard finally pulled his gaze from Tony to look at Gibbs, and gave him a little smirk that came out more like a grimace. "We've met."

Gibbs glanced back at DiNozzo. Tony looked away and took a deep breath before he replied. "Ancient history, boss."

Gibbs studied him for another few seconds then returned his gaze to Sheppard who gave him a brief nod. He let out a snort of annoyance and shook his head. "Fine. You just make sure it stays that way."

He walked over to his desk and grabbed his coffee. "DiNozzo, grab the case files. Sheppard, conference room, now," he barked and headed down the hall.


So.... whaddya think?

I've never written anything case file-ish and the only thing I know about the NCIS procedure and process is what we see on TV. I'm hella nervous about writing NCIS, but I do love Tony a whole lot.


( 17 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 14th, 2015 10:10 am (UTC)
I want more and I want it now, LOL!

Trust the advice from the co-worker, and see is she will help you flush out the self review.

Aug. 15th, 2015 01:25 am (UTC)
HAHAHA big surprise! Workin' on it.

And it was actually a surprising review in some ways, and entirely not in others. I'll post about that later.
Aug. 14th, 2015 11:55 am (UTC)
I adore crossovers and this is two old fandoms of my heart. Very interested to see where this is going!!!
Aug. 15th, 2015 01:28 am (UTC)
I am actually quite surprised there is not more crossover between these two - they seem to compliment each other nicely with the military aspect and the strong team component, granted NCIS has more of that that SGA simply because it's a larger team with more peripheral characters who come back.

I quite like the concept of Agent Afloat in Atlantis. Should they not have such at thing? I'd love to see *that* explored - someone in the NCIS hierarchy who does know.

Does SecNav know? It seems like he should.
Aug. 14th, 2015 12:54 pm (UTC)
I think that you should totally totally write a long XOVER fic because I would read it. Yay!

I also agree with you re: Ziva, Elizabeth, Keller, Sam Carter. When you ask individual people why they don't like these characters, whatever. Nobody has to like every character. It's as an aggregate that it really bothers me because the explanation seems to be that they interfere in some way with the slash juggernaut. *sigh*

Aug. 15th, 2015 01:32 am (UTC)
Well, I am feeling intimidated at the thought of it - mostly because I'm still working it out in my head - Gibbs teams hasn't figured out what happened yet and told me. Once they do, I'll let you know. :)

And yes! It's usually in slash that I see this, and I not grok. I mean, ok, sometimes you write a character with a slant where they aren't good, but it's just such a *thing* and I keep running across these and wondering if these folks are watching the same show as me. And wondering, really, why they are watching at all, because how do you enjoy it when you have a big hate on for such a major character?

Who can know the minds of fans? Eh. What can you do, but write a story that portrays the characters in a way you like? Hah!
Aug. 14th, 2015 01:21 pm (UTC)
Hee! We must be brain-twins or something, because I've been reading NCIS fic recently too, and I feel very much the same way about the various pairings. And, personally, I love your crazy idea. It's making me itch to write NCIS fic with an SGA twist...
Aug. 15th, 2015 01:34 am (UTC)
HA! We are brain sharing, clearly!

*directs controlling mind rays at you*

Aug. 14th, 2015 10:56 pm (UTC)
I love this little snippet and am intrigued to read more. :)
Re the female characters, I always liked Ziva and most of the ladies of SGA (with Keller being the glaring exception). I do think much dislike is because of the possibility of interfering with someones favorite ship.
Aug. 15th, 2015 01:40 am (UTC)
Ooh, I am glad it has caught your attention - I will endevour to deliver more. Just have to figure out what's going on - the characters haven't told me yet.

Now, see, I totally get it when someone dislikes a character for whatever reason. I've certainly watched shows I enjoyed while there was a character I wasn't crazy about on the show. I just don't grok the whole actively bashing them - I mean, if there's a character I just don't dig that much, I can just leave them out of the story, right? Makes sense to me.


I'm in this fic thing for the fun and adventure. And noting your very handsome DiNozzo Icon, I realize I need to be looking for some NCIS icons of my own as well.

Damn. I guess I've officially joined the fandom - first new one since SGA ended.
Aug. 15th, 2015 05:51 am (UTC)
I've only seen a handful of NCIS episodes - mostly ones that are heavy on Tony and/or Gibbs, because I have a friend who ships them that was rec'ing me fic. So what I've read/heard must be read with that in mind, but a lot of the Ziva hate I have seen stems from her treatment of Tony. My friend argues that Ziva constantly makes Tony feel like a failure. She's always making comments that imply Tony's inferior or unskilled, laughing at him. Which is what Tony's father did to him, and so Tony has a big complex about feeling Good Enough. So Ziva's comments and verbal poking are actually pretty damaging.

Also, I guess the actor who plays Tony didn't like Tiva, didn't want to do it, but the Ziva actress liked it and played into it. The fans who shipped it were very vocal about it, so TPTB gave in. The actor who plays Tony was still against it, but he caved in eventually too. Tony's been around since the beginning, so fans are probably protective of him, and if they feel Ziva is treating him badly, then it's going to result in a dislike of the character. Especially since the show makes their relationship romantic.

Sometimes the "I pretend I hate you" relationship can work for a ship - like Draco/Harry - but not if one half of the ship is genuinely hurt by comments made by the other half. Then again, people *like* to ship unhealthy relationships. so it's all YMMV.

That's what I've read/been told.

(I am intrigued by your fic premise!)

Edited at 2015-08-15 05:55 am (UTC)
Aug. 15th, 2015 09:56 am (UTC)
Ziva constantly makes Tony feel like a failure. She's always making comments that imply Tony's inferior or unskilled, laughing at him. Which is what Tony's father did to him, and so Tony has a big complex about feeling Good Enough. So Ziva's comments and verbal poking are actually pretty damaging.

Huh. Yeah, ok, I will readily agree there are times Ziva has gone for the jugular, especially early on. But I didn't think she was any more cruel to Tony than Kate had been. I guess, mostly, they seemed to me to have a dynamic that was more siblings trying to compete for dad's affection. I could see sparks of UST between them, but I always worry that will kill a show, so I hope the PTBs won't go there and just leave it to fanficers.

It's good to get the perspective, though - thanks.

Glad you like the premise - my goal, ultimately, would be John/Rodney - I see this as a first a foray into trying to create and solve a murder case, something I've not done before, and second, a way for John and Tony to resolve and move past what happened when they were kids. In the course of that, Rodney's going to find out that John swings both ways, and Gibbs will get confirmation of the same about Tony.

Lots to ponder. I hope I can write this!
Aug. 16th, 2015 03:57 am (UTC)
You're welcome for the perspective :)

I confess I'm relieved to read that it'll ultimately be John/Rodney, since they are my OTP. I love the idea of John and Tony knowing each other. You're right - I could totally picture the two of them having to go to the same stuffy, boring parties.

You can totally write this! You're an amazing writer.
Aug. 15th, 2015 07:03 am (UTC)
I love the snippet, more more MORE! \o/ ^_^ I'm really happy you've decided to give the story a try :)

And I also loved Ziva, I think she was awesome. But the NCIS fandom can be a scary place at times, and I hear there was a lot of animosity between Gibbs/Tony shippers and Tony/Ziva fans... (And after the actress left the show, there was a veritable sh*it storm raging.)

I've always loved Gibbs/Tony, and reading/writing other pairings is a bit hard for me :) But I'm glad you've been able to enjoy many pairings and gen stories too ^_^

I hope you'll have fun with the show and with the writing!
Aug. 15th, 2015 10:04 am (UTC)
You know, every fandom can be a scary place. I remember the shipping wars in TOS! OTPs and OTAPs and being shunned if you liked something that wasn't approved - hardcore, rabid shippers have ALWAYS been kinda scary. It's just that they have a lot more ways and places to be vocal in the age of the interwebs.

I do like the Tibbs pairing. I just wish that the people who write it would stop turning Gibbs into a mush pot in the bedroom, or making Tony so girly. Seriously. They are both quintessential MEN and it drives me INSANE when they are suddenly out of character because they're about to have sex. Just... no. YARGH.

In any case, I foresee myself coming to you with questions and requests for tips / pointer / suggestions as I work out where I'm going with this thing. I hope you're good with that!
Aug. 15th, 2015 01:56 pm (UTC)
Well I'll do my best for sure! :)
Aug. 17th, 2015 04:03 pm (UTC)
Yes please.

Oh, did you want more than that?

I has a mighty need to see more of this, please and thank you. I think it'll be fun, and god knows I need fic to read.

Also, I always get my ideas in the car - another place that is impossible to write shit down. :(
( 17 comments — Leave a comment )


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